To the tune of: "Deck the Halls"
The Christmas Card Picture Carol - A true story
Time to take the family picture,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Now it seems like just a big blur,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
When we got there, no appointment,
Fa la la , la la la, la la la.
Eleven people knew what that meant,
Fa la la la la , la la la la.

Crying children, cranky grownups,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Trying not to have any blow-ups,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
They squeezed us in and snapped some photos,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
Messy Make up, runny noses,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Time to check the proofs is here,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
How they turned out is my fear,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Could this be? Oh, what a blessing,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
How we look is quite impressing!
Fa la la la la la, la la la la

Happy folks with smiling faces,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Sitting sweetly in their places,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
They looked radiant, lovely and charming,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
All was great in spite of everything!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Though the cards turned out quite well,
Fa la la la la , la la la la
Never again would I go through that hell!
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Making it work is to complicated,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
Family pictures are over-rated!
Fa la la la la, la la la la

Norma Hammer, Golden Valley, MN

To the tune of: "She'll be Comin' 'Round the Mountain"
You'll be waking Christmas morning, and you'll see,
there's a pile of presents underneath your Tree,
OH,.. the kids are up too early,
and the only one who's smiling
is the Mastercard and Visa company.

You'll be wanting just a word of "thank you, Dear,"
as you watch the wrappings flying there and here,
"Don't you know - I GOT THIS LAST YEAR,"
"WHERE'S THE BATTERY FOR ELMO?!"
and you'd like to go upstairs and shed a tear.

Then you'll set aside the presents and the mirth,
Grandma Jan starts singing of A Wondrous Birth,
Little Daniel gets a flashlight,
and shines it on the baby, in the manger
and you pray for Peace on Earth.

Heidi Ness, Hastings, MN

To the tune of: "O Christmas Tree"
Oh Shopping Mall, Oh Shopping Mall
It's so easy to charge it!
Oh Shopping Mall, Oh Shopping Mall
It's either here or at Target

Why must I wait
so long each year
To buy some gifts
for those so dear?

Oh Shopping Mall, Oh Shopping Mall
It's so easy to charge it!

Lora Hedin, Maplewood, MN

To the tune of: "O Christmas Tree"
Oh, lists I make, Oh, lists I make,
How many are your uses.
Oh, lists I make, Oh, lists I make,
You give me needed clues-es.
The gifts to buy,
The treats to bake,
The cards to send,
The wreaths to make.
Oh, lists I make, Oh, lists I make,
You save me from excuses.

Oh, gifts I buy, Oh, gifts I buy,
My plastic card is maxing.
Oh, gifts I buy, Oh, gifts I buy,
This shopping, it is taxing.
The tie for dad,
The teen's CD,
The toys for kids,
The clothes for me.
Oh, gifts I buy, Oh, gifts I buy,
My bank account's not waxing.

Oh, treats I bake, Oh, treats I bake,
Old recipes I'm using.
Oh, treats I bake, Oh, treats I bake,
New recipes are confusing.
Marshmallow cornflake
Wreaths I form,
Sugar cookies I adorn.
Oh, treats I bake, Oh, treats I bake,
My diet, it is losing.

Oh, cards I send, Oh, cards I send,
How many are the choices.
Oh, cards I send, Oh, cards I send,
There are so many voices.
Tasteless humor, sweet sentiment,
Each stamp will cost thirty-seven cents.
Oh, cards I send, Oh, cards I send,
To all the girls and boys-es

Oh, wreaths I make, Oh, wreaths I make,
Your sap it is so sticky.
Oh, wreaths I make, Oh, wreaths I make,
Your needles are so prickly.
I make you round the best I can.
Oval or square is not the plan.
Oh, wreaths I make, Oh, wreaths I make,
I shouldn't be so picky.

Oh, song I sing, Oh, song I sing,
People think you are way too long.
Oh, song I sing, Oh, song I sing,
They aren't so very far from wrong.
I cannot give out all my lists.
But now I think you get the gist.
Oh, song I sing, Oh, song I sing,
Now you'll be on my list of songs.

Kris Tromiczak, Minneapolis, MN

To the tune of: "O Christmas Tree"
O Interest Rates, O Interest Rates
Like snowflakes you've been falling
O Interest Rates, O Interest Rates
Our mortgage broker's calling,
"Home equity's the way to go
To finance Christmas gifts, you know."
O Interest Rates, O Interest Rates
Like snowflakes you've been falling

O Retail Sales, O Retail Sales,
We'll try to get you going
O Retail Sales, O Retail Sales
Big money we'll be owing
We'll use American Express
At Marshall Field's to buy a dress
O Retail Sales, O Retail Sales
We'll try to get you going

Economy, Economy
We need a big expansion
Economy, Economy
We'd like to buy a mansion
Our incomes and investments need
A major boost, oh yes indeed
Economy, Economy
We need a big expansion

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree
We can't afford to light you
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree
We didn't mean to slight you
We bought a house, we charged the toys
And just found out we're unemployed
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree
We can't afford to light you

Kris Henderson, Edina, MN

To the tune of: "Deck the Halls"
T'is the season for the cold;
Ahhh-choo!
Sniffling, sneezing, runny nose;
Ahhh-choo!
Bags of cough drops,
boxes of Kleenex!
Ahhh-ahhh-ahhh-choo!
What a way to spend your Christmas;
Ahhh.....CHOO!!!

Sally Jo Hanks, St. Paul, MN

To the tune of: "O Christmas Tree"
Oh MPR, Oh MPR!
How frequent are your pledge drives!
Oh MPR, Oh MPR!
It seems you're always pleading.
Not only in the summertime,
But even in winter is thy prime.
Oh MPR, oh MPR,
Here comes another pledge drive.

Oh MPR, oh MPR,
Much pleasure doth thou bring me!
Oh MPR, Oh MPR,
Much pleasure doth thou bring me!
You drive with me as morning dawns,
As evening falls you come along.
With cars and cooks and travel plans
The weekend with you is so grand.

Oh MPR, Oh MPR,
What would I do without you?
Where would I get my news and fun?
I would be lost without you
The shows are great throughout the year
With depth you no where else can hear
Oh MPR, oh MPR,
I'm going to keep on pledging.

Mark Mironer, Edina, MN

To the tune of: "O Christmas Tree"
O Holidays, O Holidays!
You warm the hearts of many!
O Holidays, O Holidays!
You warm the hearts of many!
This time of love and peacefulness,
Rings true of hope and happiness.
O Holidays, O Holidays!
You warm the hearts of many!

O Holidays, O Holidays,
Your brilliant lights amaze me!
O Holidays, O Holidays,
Your brilliant lights amaze me!
The Christmas season holidays,
Hold caroling and Christmas Plays.
O Holidays, O Holidays,
Your brilliant lights amaze me!

O Holidays, O Holidays,
You bring back childhood memories.
O Holidays, O Holidays,
You bring back childhood memories.
We'd pack the car and drive to town,
Displays with lights were all around.
O Holidays, O Holidays,
You bring back childhood memories.

Karmie Dwinnel, Spooner, WI

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